Monday, February 2, 2009

Wasp, Africa-style

I engaged a mighty beast in battle today in my office. It was a wasp, at least as big as me, maybe bigger. Probably 6', 200 lbs. Welllll, maybe 2" long. At least 1 1/2". I spotted him on my window and then did the typical just-making-sure check that he was on the outside... but he wasn't. He was definitely 3 feet away from me on the inside of the window, ready to kill me at any second. I took off my shoe and swatted him, with easily enough force to kill a standard North American bug. He was unfazed. In fact, I think I heard him scoff at me. He crawled around on the window some more and then flew into the the flourescent lighting in the ceiling. Undeterred, I soon had both shoes off and was standing on top of my chair trying to flush him out of his hiding place, taunting him and trying to draw him out. Atfer 5 minutes of this, he eventually came out, and I was able to clap him between both shoes. I had won the battle.

Or so I thought. This was the picture I took immediately afterward, before heading to get a glass of water. When I came back, he had flipped over and was beginning to crawl / flap his wings again. He had come back to life. I quickly took my shoe off again and delivered another deathblow. Inferring that regular zombie rules would apply, I found a pen cap and used it to decapitate him. With the head removed and some appendages still twitching, I finally declared a lasting victory. The body and the head remain on my windowsill as a warning to all other wasps, should they dare to enter my office. I may have to have it mounted and stuffed - my first successful wild game hunt in Africa.

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